Agnes the Prissy Prom Queen Armalite AR 10
Agnes the Prissy Prom Queen Armalite AR 10 was created by Moby
Armalite's.....they think their all that. What a snob.
We’d been in each other’s company for more than a week getting to know each other. Work kept us from getting down to business quicker. Sitting together on the couch. Some petting, working of the action and even third base as I lubed her up for the first time. She was cold being a virgin. Dry as a bone with never a penetration from a patch, or a brass brush. Much less a cartridge. That night I talked her into allowing me fondle her bolt and covered it in lube and work it in good. Being at home we both knew we couldn’t go all the way. This gave her a false sense of security. It gave me an excitement with in knowing eventually I’d have my way with her. While lubed up and ready, she remained cold.
Finally, our long awaited date at the range. I grabbed her case and place her on the shooting bench. Slowly I opened her pelican 1750 latches and gently removed her from her foam clothing. She was in my hands now but still cold as ice. Agnes is still a snob. Being an Armalite she thinks she’s better than the rest. What a prissy rifle. She’s pretty and she knows it! The stuck up prom queen.
I’m excited now, looking forward to breaking in this beauty and feeling her fire power. I open her breach and she’s rock solid like an aerobics instructor. Running a patch through her barrel coated with lube she’s at attention now. She knows what’s coming. Set up on the shooting bench with my ammo, my Ottis cleaning kit and a rifle rest she knows we need no romantic music. She’ll do the singing. She's excited as I load a single cartridge into a 10 round magazine. I gently insert the magazine into her open and willing receiver. She’s no snob now. She’s as anxious as a high school prom date after a six pack with no prom dress on.
Primed and ready, muzzle down range, she’s still cool but worked up and ready. I peer through her 4X Bushnell scope and sight in. I hold her firmly, and with intent. I push the bolt release and it slams forward grabbing a cartridge and ramming it into her chamber. She gasps and settles in for the main event. I caress her trigger and she’s about to blow. A gentle squeeze to take up the first stage of the trigger. She panting now, every nerve in her is poised and ready. I squeeze the second stage slowly, cross hairs on the target. BANG she spits fire and brass coated lead down range at 1400 feet per second. She wants to go again and she’s warm now. But I hold her back. Slow and steady Agnes, this is your first time. I remove her magazine and lube a patch and put it on the Ottis cable. I gently insert it into her breech. It’s coated in lube and she likes it. I slowly pull from chamber to muzzle. She moans. I load another round into the magazine. She’s still warm and ready now. Slam goes the bolt, I aim, the safety clicks off, and the gentle squeeze again. BANG!!! She’s loving it. I repeat the process 30 times. One shot, then mop. One shot, then mop. She’s hot and fired up now. The foreplay is over; She’s been worked up and is ready to roll. I load ten rounds in a magazine. She’s extremely excited. She knows what’s coming. She’s a carbine, a combat rifle. Ready to rock and roll and send lead down range with devastating fire power. I sight in. No more messing around now. She’s wants to rock. I take the slack up in the trigger. She quivers. We’re on target. Bang! Then again, BANG! Then 3 in succession BANG, BANG, BANG! She’s hot and rollin now.
I check the target, then re-sight, BANG, BANG. Then again BANG, BANG, BANG!. She never misses a beat. It was great for both of us. She’s still hot and of course never satisfied. I too want to continue our date. But at a $1 plus per trigger pull our date must end. 40 rounds is enough for one day for me, but not Agnes.
She’s ANGRY AGNES!!!
A COMBAT CARBINE ARMALITE AR 10!!!
Back home we caress and think about our date. We look at the picture we took with fond memories. Back to being a snob she points out my inexperience with her and points to the target missing a round. What a B!tch. She’s says I don’t have experience handling such a thoroughbred. I’m hurt, but smiling. I know we’ll do it again!!!
I gently spread upper and lower receivers and clean her from stem to stern. She's cold again. Uncaring, no passion, as if I didn’t exist. Agnes your such a snob. But a powerful angry snob. Yes…it was definitely good for me. So that was my first date with Agnes. The Armalite AR 10 prom queen. A pretty, powerful, devastating, work of art. And she’s all mine. She’s no virgin now!
I need help. What an awesome rifle!!!
We’d been in each other’s company for more than a week getting to know each other. Work kept us from getting down to business quicker. Sitting together on the couch. Some petting, working of the action and even third base as I lubed her up for the first time. She was cold being a virgin. Dry as a bone with never a penetration from a patch, or a brass brush. Much less a cartridge. That night I talked her into allowing me fondle her bolt and covered it in lube and work it in good. Being at home we both knew we couldn’t go all the way. This gave her a false sense of security. It gave me an excitement with in knowing eventually I’d have my way with her. While lubed up and ready, she remained cold.
Finally, our long awaited date at the range. I grabbed her case and place her on the shooting bench. Slowly I opened her pelican 1750 latches and gently removed her from her foam clothing. She was in my hands now but still cold as ice. Agnes is still a snob. Being an Armalite she thinks she’s better than the rest. What a prissy rifle. She’s pretty and she knows it! The stuck up prom queen.
I’m excited now, looking forward to breaking in this beauty and feeling her fire power. I open her breach and she’s rock solid like an aerobics instructor. Running a patch through her barrel coated with lube she’s at attention now. She knows what’s coming. Set up on the shooting bench with my ammo, my Ottis cleaning kit and a rifle rest she knows we need no romantic music. She’ll do the singing. She's excited as I load a single cartridge into a 10 round magazine. I gently insert the magazine into her open and willing receiver. She’s no snob now. She’s as anxious as a high school prom date after a six pack with no prom dress on.
Primed and ready, muzzle down range, she’s still cool but worked up and ready. I peer through her 4X Bushnell scope and sight in. I hold her firmly, and with intent. I push the bolt release and it slams forward grabbing a cartridge and ramming it into her chamber. She gasps and settles in for the main event. I caress her trigger and she’s about to blow. A gentle squeeze to take up the first stage of the trigger. She panting now, every nerve in her is poised and ready. I squeeze the second stage slowly, cross hairs on the target. BANG she spits fire and brass coated lead down range at 1400 feet per second. She wants to go again and she’s warm now. But I hold her back. Slow and steady Agnes, this is your first time. I remove her magazine and lube a patch and put it on the Ottis cable. I gently insert it into her breech. It’s coated in lube and she likes it. I slowly pull from chamber to muzzle. She moans. I load another round into the magazine. She’s still warm and ready now. Slam goes the bolt, I aim, the safety clicks off, and the gentle squeeze again. BANG!!! She’s loving it. I repeat the process 30 times. One shot, then mop. One shot, then mop. She’s hot and fired up now. The foreplay is over; She’s been worked up and is ready to roll. I load ten rounds in a magazine. She’s extremely excited. She knows what’s coming. She’s a carbine, a combat rifle. Ready to rock and roll and send lead down range with devastating fire power. I sight in. No more messing around now. She’s wants to rock. I take the slack up in the trigger. She quivers. We’re on target. Bang! Then again, BANG! Then 3 in succession BANG, BANG, BANG! She’s hot and rollin now.
I check the target, then re-sight, BANG, BANG. Then again BANG, BANG, BANG!. She never misses a beat. It was great for both of us. She’s still hot and of course never satisfied. I too want to continue our date. But at a $1 plus per trigger pull our date must end. 40 rounds is enough for one day for me, but not Agnes.
She’s ANGRY AGNES!!!
A COMBAT CARBINE ARMALITE AR 10!!!
Back home we caress and think about our date. We look at the picture we took with fond memories. Back to being a snob she points out my inexperience with her and points to the target missing a round. What a B!tch. She’s says I don’t have experience handling such a thoroughbred. I’m hurt, but smiling. I know we’ll do it again!!!
I gently spread upper and lower receivers and clean her from stem to stern. She's cold again. Uncaring, no passion, as if I didn’t exist. Agnes your such a snob. But a powerful angry snob. Yes…it was definitely good for me. So that was my first date with Agnes. The Armalite AR 10 prom queen. A pretty, powerful, devastating, work of art. And she’s all mine. She’s no virgin now!
I need help. What an awesome rifle!!!
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Replied by WES213 on topic Re: Agnes the Prissy Prom Queen Armalite AR 10
Good GOD this had me laughing my @$$ off, if i knew what i was about ta read i would have locked the door and closed the blinds. 
We go to war to fight terrorism and Communism then vote for a terrifying communist to lead us God help us all.
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Replied by oldsarge on topic Re: Agnes the Prissy Prom Queen Armalite AR 10
Moby you are a case!
I laughed so hard I cried. Put a twinkle in an old mans eye and I think my heart skipped a beat or two.
Well Done.
I laughed so hard I cried. Put a twinkle in an old mans eye and I think my heart skipped a beat or two.
Well Done.
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Replied by jtallen83 on topic Re: Agnes the Prissy Prom Queen Armalite AR 10
You know you could get paid for writting like that! No stopping at 40 then! 
Thanks for the laugh!
Thanks for the laugh!
LIBERTY FIRST!
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